I’ve been tired the last few days, so I’m going to plagiarize. From myself. These are my Facebook status updates from the last week, so my apologies if you’re one of my IRL friends and now you’re all, like, “What’s up with the repeats?  Is Janet’s lame blog in summer reruns too?”

Yes, I still use Facebook. And a couple of these status updates doubled as Tweets, so I am TOTALLY phoning it in this week. That’s what happens when the weather gets above 70 degrees around here. But never fear, rain is on the way. Again.

That said, “Phoning It In Monday” might become a regular feature. You think it will catch on? It’s probably already a thing and I don’t even know it. There are no new original ideas anyway. But these status updates are original. From my own brain. Because stealing status updates is LAME.

Remember when the grocery checker would put your ice cream in separate paper freezer bags? Remember grocery checkers?

I started watching golf again. When did every male pro golfer discover hair products and get a stylist?

Scott and I got a new bed today. We haven’t been this excited since the last time we got a new bed.

I’ve always been a dog person, but I gotta say, cats are way better actors. (Side note, this was in response to a “Mad Men” episode where Peggy’s cat was sitting all chill on the couch, and I mentioned to Scott that no matter how smart dogs are they always appear to be looking to their trainer off camera. Cats don’t have trainers.)

While I was doing cardio at the gym today I watched a guy across the street at Wendy’s quickly climb up and down a ladder several times carrying various large tools and supplies to do a roof repair. I think I sweat off about 75 extra anxiety calories watching him. He was wearing a cowboy hat though, so I’m pretty sure he was following all the necessary safety precautions. (Another side note, my gym’s cardio machines overlook the Wendy’s parking lot, and I have considered writing a blog about the Wendy’s parking lot about 5,000 times. I think I could get a book deal.)

I’ll never get tired of taking a nice brisk walk while listening to “Paradise City” by Guns N’ Roses. And wearing my white leather suit.

Scott and I married young and waited ten years before we decided to have a kid. We were busy building careers, drinking beer, and hanging out with friends. We had a lot of friends. We tried a lot of beers.

When we finally decided to get pregnant we agreed that Scott would stay home with the baby. This seemed like a brilliant idea for all sorts of reasons. I had a good paying secure government job I liked with all sorts of cool benefits, and at the time Scott worked as a programmer, so he could easily work part time from home. Plus Scott had always been the better chef and master gardener, as well as the alpha dog to our two adorable Labradors. Scott’s just one of those annoying people who is good at everything, so obviously he was going to master parenting too.

Weren’t we cute?  Because despite our education and experience, we both failed to understand that a baby is not a pot roast, a plant or even a dog. Did we learn nothing from the time Scott tried to take our yellow lab to his dog-friendly workplace several years prior?  Yeah, she got fired…

But armed with our ignorance and enthusiasm, we forged ahead and Scott became a Stay at Home Dad (SAHD)/Work at Home Dad (WAHD) in 2000 before it was all the rage. Of course, now every household has one, but Scott was a trendsetter! Oh I’m sure there were other dads doing what he did around that time, but it certainly wasn’t even close to the norm, and there didn’t appear to be a bunch of blogs or dad support groups to turn to. At least ones Scott cared to participate in. He’s never been one to ask for help. That would be impolite. Plus Scott likes to figure stuff out on his own.

I went back to work when Finn was three months old, and Scott went to work caring for a baby full time while subsequently realizing that taking care of a baby is pretty boring, pretty all consuming and effing hard. Kind of like computer programming. Which is why you can’t program and take care of a baby at the same time. Who knew?

But we muddled through those first several years just like all new parents. We made adjustments to our routine until that routine didn’t work and then we made more adjustments.

Scott has always been the primary parent. He changed way more diapers, administered more medicine, and tediously prepared more toddler snacks than I ever did. He’s been woken up more in the middle of the night (sucks for him that he’s a light sleeper, no?). He has taken Finn to all of his doctor appointments, dentist appointments, and eye exams. He has attended numerous birthday parties, volunteered weekly in several classrooms, and driven on field trips. He helped coach basketball, baseball and soccer before Finn finally convinced us his  disinterest in any and all things related to sports wasn’t just a phase. He’s sat through piano lessons and struggled with homework. He’s played drums and endless hours of video games with the kid. He even took Finn to a Skrillex concert for crying out loud. That alone should get him Honorable Mention for Father of the Year.

In retrospect, Finn was an easy kid, but no kid is easy when you’re in the weeds. Finn never had colic or threw tantrums. He typically slept through the night like a champ, and woke up cheerful. He’s just a happy kid. But he never liked to nap, never liked to sit still, and ALWAYS liked to chat. He talked early and often, and his chatter/singing invaded every one of Scott’s waking thoughts, which can be a little disconcerting for a guy who is pretty quiet and introspective.

Pretty sure Finn is chatting or singing up a storm in this photo right here.

Scott has had his parenting ups and downs, but in all that chaos he also discovered he really didn’t like his programming job, and embarked on a career in photography.  Who knows if he would have discovered his passion had he not opted to stay at home with Finn?

Over the years father and son have had their battles.  It took me a long time to let Scott and Finn have the relationship they needed to have instead of the relationship I thought they should have.  Butting out is not my style.  I like to run things, remember?

But now that Finn is a teenager they’ve settled into a very comfortable and loving relationship that I deeply admire and appreciate. They still have their moments, but it warms my heart to see them laughing at internet memes, talking about girl problems or working on photography projects. They have a lot of fun.

Probably too much fun.

I know dads have been taking care of kids for years. It’s not like Scott invented fatherhood. But it takes a man who is very secure in his masculinity to be the primary caregiver. He was and is pretty special. And I think our kid is turning out pretty special as a result of having Scott for a dad.

I mean, he taught Finn how to do his own laundry last year. I’m STILL trying to figure out what all those settings do.

And as a result of our parenting style Finn believes moms and dads do anything and everything. How wonderful is that?

Except turn on the grill. I’ve convinced him moms don’t do that. We like our eyebrows too much.

My BFF Bill used to be my work buddy, but then he had to go and retire three years ago, so now I have to settle for seeing him for the occasional lunch date (the man is busier now than he was when he was working full time). Yesterday Bill took a break from his casino trips many volunteer activities to come back to his old agency for an LGBT Pride event.

Bill has always been politically active, and last September when he was working on the Approve R-74 campaign (Washington United for Marriage) he saw a request for volunteers for a music video. So Bill dragged his niece to the filming and that’s how he ended up being in Macklemore’s “Same Love” video.  The video was released a month later and Bill posted the video on his Facebook page with the following note:

It’s pretty sad when a 61-year old man sits by his computer screen slowing playing the video to search for himself! Whatever! It starts around 3:50 and then 4:06 and 4:25. For much of the time in between, I skillfully play “man on the right of the aisle in the second row with his back to the camera.” My big part comes at 4:37 and 4:38. Please remember to pause the video to capture all the nuances. Most important, vote to “Approve R-74!”

I’m not posting the video here (you have two fingers and Google), but you may be one of the 47,000,000 who saw it on YouTube or one of the millions of people who saw it on “Ellen.”  And you also know the outcome. Yay for marriage equality! Bill and his partner Chris are getting married this summer, and I couldn’t be happier.

Then in March of this year my BFF Carla’s daughter Emily was on a flight to California (spring break!) when who should she run into?  Macklemore.  At this point the Macklemore & Ryan Lewis song “Thrift Shop” had just become a ginormous hit and they had recently performed on “Saturday Night Live.”  Emily was pretty excited.

Cut to last week when I was having lunch with my BFF Terry (I know, I have a lot of BFFs) and his son Jamil who was in town visiting.  I was telling Terry and Jamil how Scott was going to take pictures of the Macklemore hosted Summer Jam that upcoming Saturday, and Jamil says, “You mean Ben Haggerty?”  And then he proceeds to tell me how he used to rap with Ben aka Macklemore and several other guys back in the day, and that he knows people in the “Thrift Shop” video and, in fact, just saw a few of them the previous night. He said he and Macklemore were just acquaintances, but they have several friends in common.

Now I live in the Seattle area, so these Macklemore run-ins aren’t THAT unusual. But then Scott was on stage with him last weekend and got to snap a few pictures, so I have to say I’m pretty sure everyone I know has a Macklemore Brush With Fame story.

I’m still waiting on my encounter. 

Until then, have I mentioned that I’ve met Vanilla Ice?

He’s the Macklemore of my generation.